Tonight we were worshiping together and we sang the Chris Tomlin song "God of this City" which is one of our favorite songs. Anyway, Jason and I changed the lyrics just a little bit to say, "You're the God of this love. You're the King of this couple. You're the God of this marriage. You are. ... For greater things are yet to come. And greater things are still to be done in this marriage. Greater things have yet to come. And greater things are still to be done in this marriage." As I reflect on our past few years of marriage I can see how that is truly the case. God is the King of our marriage and our lives. He has already done great things in our marriage: he has taught us about Himself, about selfless love, about forgiveness, but He has also carried us through many trials: infertility, miscarriages, and a failed adoption. He has seen us through a few moves, times when we have felt blessed and fruitful and other times when we have felt dried and distant. Yet, we stand here today, walking hand-in-hand toward the King, and we both feel we are somewhat on an edge. An adventure awaits us in the years ahead, some of the adventures will be exciting others might be challenging. We're not exactly sure what is the Lord's specific plan for our future involves (perhaps overseas missions, perhaps adoption 15 children, perhaps something I can't even fathom right now), but regardless, it is true that there are greater things that have yet to come, and greater things that are still to be done in this marriage.
We are aware that some of those "greater things" may be in ways that we don't want. Perhaps an illness or handicap. We don't know, but that is what faith is all about. Following a Lord that will be with us no matter what. As our minister said a few weeks ago in a sermon, "Jesus didn't come to save us from our struggles. He came to save us from Hell." Jesus certainly can be a strength for us in hard times, but He isn't a "quick fix" and doesn't guarantee to take away our problems. Nope, instead he promises us that we WILL have trouble. Yet, clinging to Him during those trial will bring us peace and will help us stay on the path that will save us from Hell. Ultimately, spending eternity in heaven is the only thing that matter. What is it to have a happy life on earth if our souls are going to spend eternity in Hell? Anyway, didn't mean to get all "preachy" but at a time like this - when we look back and look forward - we have to reaffirm that we are couple grounded and rooted in Christ.
I believe that foundation has helped us through our struggles, but have also given us lots of laughter and trust. I love how my husband makes me laugh on a daily basis. He's so funny and he knows exactly what to say to get me to smile. Even when I'm grumpy or I'm trying to be serious... that is something I have always loved about him. When we were dating I used to think that being married to Jason would be good for many reasons, but one being that when we're 80 he'll still be making me laugh. :)
In keeping with the original title of this blog post... I'll talk about our wedding day. As most women, it was a day I'll never forget. I remember telling Jason the night before to call me when he woke up assuming fully that I would be awake long before he was. That was not the case, however. He called me at 7:30 in the morning and I was still sleeping! :) I remember getting out of bed and then heading to the store to by him a "our wedding day" card. I took a nice bath and then one of my dear friends and her boyfriend took me to get my hair done. I didn't have the traditional morning with all the bride's maids. Instead I wanted a quiet and intimate morning. I drank hot chocolate, chatted with my friend, and got my hair done. It was a very peaceful morning.
Then we went straight to the church. It was around noon and church was getting out which made for a large traffic jam (our membership is around 18,000). I rushed through the doors holding my veil in place from the wind/snow and made my way to the bride's dressing room. This room quickly became crowded with family and friends. Someone did my make up and then I began to get dressed. I sent Jason's sister to find him and deliver his groom's gift (a really nice leather brief case to replace his old). He sent her back with my bride's gift which was a Bible with my new name on it. I was filled with peace and excitement as I waited for 3:30 to roll around. There were a few moments of "oops" -- I forgot my jewelry at home and so I borrowed earrings from my sister-in-law and went without a necklace. I also thought I had packed some "special" underwear to wear under my wedding dress, but I couldn't find it anywhere. I arrived at the church in a pair that was not so attractive... so I wasn't sure what I was going to do about that. However, the sweet woman who did my makeup actually ran out and bought me some and handed it to me shortly before I walked down the aisle. It was sweet and also handed me a really big laugh.
The ceremony didn't start on time. I remember sitting in the dressing room thinking, "it is 3:30, why has the wedding not started yet?" Then the wedding coordinator came in and said there were still lots of people walking in so they were going to push the start time back a little bit. Finally, we all lined up outside the chapel doors and the processional began. My dad was a little "emotional" but I honestly was just excited to march up the aisle. I remember walking in and I couldn't even see Jason... so I looked and saw some of the people and smiled at them. As soon as I could see Jason's face, I looked at no one else.
Our ceremony was beautiful and Christ centered. Our minister did an incredible job not only making it personal for Jason and myself, but for laying out the Gospel message. We had him over a week or so before the wedding and I told him not to be afraid to use the word, "Hell" because I wanted our unsaved family and friends to have an opportunity to accept Christ if they had not yet. In fact, in our program, we mentioned that having our friends and family do that would be the best wedding gift they could give us. We had worship, scripture readings, and communion. We exchanged traditional vows.
Honestly, the thing I remember the most about our ceremony is how I felt the Lord's presence. I had never felt it so strongly anywhere before, more or less at a wedding. Jason said he felt the same thing. There was such peace, but it went beyond that. I know the Lord was orchestrating and blessing our entire day because He orchestrated and ordained our marriage. It was a very cool experience that I can't possibly describe in words, but is an experience I will never forget.
People said so many nice things about our ceremony... some saying that it was the most Christ centered wedding they have ever been to. Others saying that watching Jason and I worship was the highlight of the service. It was certainly special, that is for sure.
One funny moment was when our minister announced us "husband and wife" I automatically leaned in for the kiss while the minister was finishing up his sentence. He stopped what he was saying and said, "you're anxious, aren't you Darby? It's been a long time since January 22, 2002 hasn't it." Everyone was laughing by this point... then he continued his sentence and then told Jason he could kiss me which made everyone laugh again. Also during our kiss our minister said, "okay, okay, that's enough." :)
Right after the kiss, our minister said, "now before we end, Darby, Jason has a surprise for you." And with that Jason leaves my side and joins the band in which they play a song that he wrote for me entitled "Princess Bride." Yes, I was shocked. :)
Our reception was fun. I was determined to have a different sort of reception... I always get very hungry while waiting for the bride and groom to finish taking their photos and so we had it that people could go on and begin eating while they waited for us to arrive. After our arrival we almost immediately had our first dance, cut the cake, and threw the bouquet/guarder so that anyone who wanted to leave could and that way we could spend the rest of the night dancing and talking. It was a very fun reception.
We spent our first night in a Marriott hotel and our second night back at our new house. Someone had told me that their biggest wedding advice was not to leave for your honeymoon the next day. They mentioned packing for the honeymoon while preparing for the wedding as well as waking up early for the flight was not a lot of fun the night after the wedding. We thought that was good advice and so we were married on a Sunday and didn't leave for our honeymoon until Tuesday. I will admit that Monday at our house was fun because we could focus on packing, but also we were able to open all of our gifts! :)
When I think back on both the ceremony and the reception, I realize how wonderful that day was... but as any married couple knows... the wedding is not the most important day of your life. It is only one day in your lifetime together and it is each and every day after your wedding that is by far more important. So, yes, I love to take the trip down memory lane - especially this time of year - but I'm thankful for each and every day that I am married to my best friend. Marriage is such an incredible blessing!!!!
Thanks for allowing me to share my memories and here are some photos to recap the day! :)
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