Thursday, October 20, 2011

Dating Anniversary!

October 19, 2002:

It was a Saturday and I was getting ready to attend a wedding of some friends from church. My date for evening was a good friend of mine named Jason. A young man who I had been friends with for the past 10 months. Jason and I had been " casual dating" for the past four months. We were seeing a lot of each other... going out to eat, movies, concerts, at his apartment, participating in ministries and mission trips together and the like. We would hold hands or he would put his arm around me, but we never kissed and we were not "boyfriend/girlfriend". He had started one conversation with me about a month earlier, in which he stated that while he enjoyed going out with me, he wasn't ready for an exclusive relationship because he had just started medical school  and the work was taking up all of his time. Plus, just a few months prior, he had broken up with a girlfriend and he was still trying to heal from that relationship. I was alright with his pacing and expressed that to him. I truly enjoyed his friendship and all our spiritual discussions. We worked together in a few different ministries at church and so saw each other a few times a week. After church on Sunday and Wednesday we would usually go out to eat or to see a movie. He invited me over to his apartment a lot to play games, eat pizza, and work on ministry things. Occasionally I would make him dinner and on big test days I asked him to leave his apartment unlocked and while he was taking the test I would clean his apartment and leave him notes about how I prayed for him. We had been to a Steven Curtis Chapman concert just a few weeks before which was a memorable date for me. We would also meet on campus a lot where he was a medical student and I was a sophomore in my undergrad years. We enjoyed "bumping" into each other often and had a very easy friendship. Our favorite thing to do together was pray. It was a perfect friendship.

I spent the morning shopping for a new outfit and getting my hair cut and styled at a local spa. I was looking forward to a fun, fall wedding. Once I was ready, I made my way over to Jason's apartment where we were going to hang out before leaving for the wedding. I knock on the door, my heart racing as it always did when I was in his presence, and I hear him call from inside, "Come on in."

I walk and and there he is (looking very handsome) standing in front of TV watching an Ohio State vs. Wisconsin game. He does not hide his double take as I enter. He was impressed with my appearance and loved my hair. He walks over, greets me with a hug, and then tells me how nice I look. I'm wearing a skirt, nice shirt, my hair is styled in a very nice "up-do" and I'm wearing a long dress rain coat that he still tells me how much he likes. :) We watch a little of the game and then we turn it off early to leave for the wedding. We ride to the wedding in his old 93 Dodge Dakota Truck. It was rainy and somewhat chilly, but it worked out well, because we had to stand close to each other under Jason's umbrella when walking to/from the car. In fact, Jason remembers how natural pulling me close and putting his arm around my waist felt to him. Perhaps that is another one of the reasons it ended up being such a special night.

We hold hands during the ceremony, but as I mentioned, holding hands, even his arm around my waist, wasn't out of the ordinary. The wedding was beautiful and Christ Centered. Jason and I were very happy for the bride and groom. We head on the reception which was at the Louisville Slugger Field. The reception was very personal and fun! Jason started the conversation (!) about things he wanted at his wedding (which of course is a favorite conversation of this girl) and whispered in my ear, "you know, it takes a lot for me to look up from a football game... especially if it is an Ohio State game... especially if they are losing, but when you walked in my door I couldn't look at anything else." :)  Jason and I sat at a table with another couple and we shared stories and laughter with them. The husband of that couple finally asked how long we had been together. A little awkward pause and then Jason said (with his arm still around my shoulders), "Actually, we are aren't dating, but really good friends." Another slight pregnant pause. I am certainly okay with his answer, but now I'm oddly aware that his arm is around my shoulder and that might continue to give others the wrong idea... so I discretely move my chair a little farther away from Jason so that his arm can't be around me anymore.

Later that evening, we hit the dance floor for a little bit (I loved our dances to "Love Shack" and "How Do I Live?" the best that night) and enjoy a fun evening at the reception. We had a few funny moments that are still inside jokes between us. Finally, after we eat some cake, we say goodbye to the happy couple and head back to Jason's truck. He takes me to the medical school campus and shows me around. I see his desk, his locker, and his classrooms. We pray together there for him and his medical school career. Then we head back to his apartment.

Once inside, he makes us some snacks and we watch some of the baseball playoffs together. We end up snuggling in front of the TV and I fall asleep pretty quickly (baseball is about the same as watching paint dry, to me at least). I end up waking up because I'm cold and really have to go to the bathroom, but I realize Jason is asleep and his arm is around me. The clock says it is about 2:30 in the morning. I'm not sure what time Jason fell asleep, but the TV was still on (again, we are in his living room, don't get any wrong ideas that we were in his bed... ha) and Shakira is singing 'Underneath Your Clothes" on some late night talk show. I lay there, very still, not wanting to wake Jason up. Not sure how long it was, but finally, he woke up too. So,  in a very  20 year old fashion, I show my immaturity by acting like I'm asleep. I wanted to see what he would do or how he would try to wake me up. He stretches a little, looks at me, looks at the clock, and then pulls me closer to himself. I still act as if I'm sleep, but I won't lie, my heart was racing even more than usual. That's when he moves some of my hair and begins to kiss the side of my neck, my cheek, and then turns my head towards him (I'm "awake" by this point) and kisses me on the lips. I kiss him back.

Seriously, the first (and only) thought going through my head was, "I can't believe the Jason Dugger is kissing me." You see, I had been attracted to Jason from the first moment I had met him. I don't know if it is the fact he is older than me by several years or if it is because he is the most amazing man I've ever met, but I always assumed he was way out of my league. I still don't know how I managed to attract such an amazing man. He loves the Lord, he is intelligent, musically talented, althetically talented, funny, kind, and the list goes on and on... :). Okay, back to 2002, :), he kisses me for a little bit. It was great.

We don't kiss very long (boundaries), but after our kiss we just smile and Jason said he had been wanting to do that for a while. He confessed he wasn't sure how he was going to start a relationship with me while in his first year of medical school, but he was going to find some way to make it work because "friends don't kiss" - I loved his integrity in wanting to pursue me the right way... giving me the time and commitment he needed to in order to honor the kiss he had just given me. I told him that if God was calling me to be his girlfriend then He would help me be the girlfriend I needed to be to him despite the medical school thing. It didn't seem like a big deal to me, but that is one of the many things I love about Jason is he is very serious and takes commitments (both academically and relationally) very serious and wants to give his best. After our conversation we prayed together and then I went back to my house on cloud nine. There had been several dates over the last few months where I would leave his house and just pray that the Lord would bring us together because he was such an amazing man... so my drive home that night was one of my happiest conversations with the Lord. I felt like such a blessed woman to be Jason's girlfriend. And I was... and still am.

October 19th, 2011

It was a rainy and cold Wednesday. I woke up early for my Bible Study and Jason helps me get the children ready and to church. I go to my Bible Study where I learn from some amazing women and he spends some time in the Word while waiting on me. After church, Jason helps me load up the children and listens to me talk about what I learned on the drive home. We get home and he offers to make lunch while i play with the children. When lunch is ready I see it is the first meal he ever made for me back when we were dating: some peanut Thai recipe. (I remember he made it for me on December 22, 2002... he had started Christmas break and he wanted to do "our Christmas" that night and he had me come over and he had made this dinner. He had made me dinners before, but those were frozen meals... this was the first one he "actually made" for me. And we had a nice candle lit dinner that night). I remember not liking it back in 2002, but back then I didn't like different types of food, but now I love Thai food so I gobbled it up and loved how romantic his gesture was in the midst of taking care of three children. We spent some time together  during the children's nap times instead of doing chores and really just enjoyed each others company. Later that night, after our daughter's speech therapy, we had a babysitter come and we went on a date night. We grabbed a quick bite to eat and then went to see the movie Courageous. It was great to be out and the movie was good. I was so thankful to be sitting next to "the" Jason Dugger.... now as his wife. We've been married for almost seven years, we've experienced trials and pains, we've experienced joys and laughter.... but last night as I watched the movie about being a courageous father... I knew I was married to one of the best fathers in the world.  -- I am so blessed to be married (and still dating!) Jason... he is amazing. He has my complete respect, my total trust, and all of my heart. I am also glad he still humors me in celebrating our "dating anniversary" - he's a great husband and God has blessed me so much by giving me him to lead our family. Nine years after our first kiss... my heart still races and I still often find myself thinking, "I can't believe "the" Jason Dugger is kissing me." So thankful...

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