Havana of Great Faith!

Our sweet girl has such an incredible faith in the Lord! She is always encouraging me in my own walk by all of her deep questions... she brings up God all. the. time.

Here are a few examples of her incredible child-like faith:

Selah had broken a DVD that Havana really enjoyed (baby bach) and a few days later Havana asked to watch it. I told her that it wasn't going to work because it was cracked and that "you can't fix a crack in a DVD" -- as sure as anything she said, "God could heal it!" My response was, "You're right, Havana, God can... doesn't mean He always will... but He can do anything."

While having her rest time I overheard her sing, "I may be a small girl, but I can do big things for You, God."

She loves to get on the microphone (of her littler karaoke machine) and sing "You should know God. You should tell everyone about God. He loves us all so much. He can do anything." -- she went on and on about how amazing God is and how we should tell everyone about Him.

One day, she was crying upstairs, and Jason told me he overheard her praying, "God, I am alone... can you come and be with me?" I have overheard her praying for Him to help her find things.

She asks a lot of questions about heaven, what God looks like, and how can we hear God. I have been working with her to listen to God with her heart and that we can see him by looking at his beautiful creation and seeing kindness in others.

She knows her bible. She knows the stories, the order, and her Bible verses. She is passionate about us reading it together each day.

The other day she drew a picture... when she showed it to me my heart leapt. It was a note that she wrote on her own that said, "Havana loves Frank." Frank is our sponsored child in Africa that we write to and pray for often. he is only six. She said he was on her heart and she wanted to write to him. This was completely unprompted by me! When I shared that with Jason at dinner, he told Havana that God was speaking to her by laying it on her heart to write to Frank. I told her how God is going to use her to encourage others. She has such a golden spirit...

About three weeks ago she began to tell us she has God in her heart. We talk about that a lot at our house... how daddy and mommy have "Jesus in their heart" and how people who have "Jesus in their heart" can hear him and go to heaven and have a hope that isn't in this world or in ourselves. How awesome! Anyway, she began saying she had God in her heart and at first I thought it was just talk, but then I began to see a difference in her. She is truly being transformed into a selfless, obedient little girl... she still struggles of course... but it isn't like how it was. I told Jason that perhaps she did, all on her own, as Jesus into her heart.

So amazed by my little girl. Praying every day that her faith takes root deep within her heart.

Jonah the Firefighter

Dear Jonah,

You are almost 3.5 years old... you asked me tonight when you will turn 4 and for some reason that sounded old to me. I can't believe you are quickly approaching the end of your toddler years! It is a sheer delight and gift to be your mother.

You LOVE firetrucks... watching them, pretending to ride them...
You LOVe pretending you are a firefighter. The other night at dinner you were talking about being "Firefighter Jonah" and I told Daddy, "Jonah sure does love to pretend he is a firefighter" and you said "Not pretend... am!" (my bad...)
You love to rescue things... and you spend hours playing firefighter each and every day. God laid on my heart that He gave you the heart of a hero and so I try to tell you that at least once a day.

Jonah, God gave you the heart of a hero. It will be so fun to watch you grow into the purposes He has had planned for You since the beginning of time.

For your third birthday we threw you a firefighter bday party. You had a small friend gathering at the ark and then a small family party complete with fire cupcakes. You delighted in everyone singing you "Happy Birthday" -- what a special party for such a special boy.

Because of your great passion, your daddy ordered you a Firetruck bed! You LOVE it. There is a steering wheel and daddy added a hose... you love spending time in your room. You even ask up to go up to your room to play in your bed. How fun! You don't know it yet, but your daddy has also ordered you a real flashing siren that should be here soon. You will love it!

I don't know when your passion for firefighting started... I remember last year you burned your hand on the fireplace because you were trying to get a good look at the pilot flame. You also have been shocked by an outlet, stung by a jellyfish, and burned by a sparkler... so one would think you would avoid anything resembling a fire truck, but nope... it has only made you that much more passionate.

A few days ago we took you to the fire station. The nice firemen gave you a tour and taught you a little but about fire safety. Tonight, when I was tucking you in, you asked if we could go back there because you wanted to ride in the firetruck again.

Jonah, you are funny. Naturally funny. You don't even try to be comical and yet you send us all into hysterics. You make funny face, you tell funny jokes, and you have really funny dance moves. The other night you introduced us to "Conkey" -- you named one of our toys Conkey and then proceeded to talk about him all the time. I will ask you a question and you will answer "Conkey" -- he has become your imaginary friend. I still don't know where you came up with that word, but you are passionate about him.

You are also so smart. Daddy and I are still talking and praying about what to do with you and school... we aren't sure if we are going to hold you back or not, but regardless of the fact we don't think you would enjoy a school setting right now you are super smart. You are freakishly good at the game "Memory" and you do remember random things (names of characters, reasons you were in trouble a few weeks ago, etc.).  Just today when we picked you up from your Sunday School class, the teacher saw your worksheet and couldn't believe it was yours because your handwriting was so good! I'm so proud of you, bubby.

You are beginning to really enjoy being a boy. You love to play ball and rough house... it is fun, after years of playing with havana's toys, to see you naturally thrive in your boyish nature. I will even ask you for a kiss and you will say, "Um, no thank you." Or "yuck." (which I don't approve of, by the way, you are way to young to be calling my kisses "yuck") .

Your communication skills are awesome. You are learning responsibility by always cleaning up your own plate and cup after meals. You are learning how to put on your own clothes and you have mastered the art of peeing and pooping in in the potty (for a while you could only pee...). There isn't a day that goes by where i am not completely amazed by you. I am so very blessed to be your mommy.

As Jonah approached this dinosaur he said, "Is he going to eat me?" My safety-first boy!

Dear Asa

Dear Asa,

Tonight is Sunday, October 6th... this past Friday, October 4th, you turned 9 months old. I don't know where the time goes. It wasn't that long ago that you were merely my (breech) baby in the belly. Then you were born and time exploded... now you are my 9 month little dude. My heart aches and celebrates this... something you most likely won't understand until you are a parent yourself.

You remain my super content little boy. You honestly make life so easy because you are agreeable, flexible, and almost always smiling! I could snuggle you forever and so I delight in the fact that you are still somewhat of a snuggle bug!

You aren't crawling yet, but you do roll and lurch everywhere. There has been more than one occasion where I put you down in one room and then am totally surprised when I find you in a different room only a few minutes later.

You have two bottom teeth and a huge appetite. You eat anything I put in front of you - although the past few days you have been protesting the baby food and demanding solids. I'm okay with that! :)

You laugh and shriek at your siblings... you were so excited yesterday when we moved you to a new "big boy" carset... we have put away the baby boat, the boppy, the floor mats, and your swings. You have now officially outgrown the baby phase. Again, my heart celebrates and grieves this.

You struggled with sleep the first 8.5 months of your life, but now it seems that you have it down pat. I think you've been sleeping through the night for a week now! Ha. You struggled with spitting up the first 8.5 months of your life as well... projectile spit up was your signature until last week. Now, you have put away those childish things and moved on. ;) But even with the no sleep and the constant spit up... I could not have asked for a better 4th child than you. You are terrific!

I tell you every day that I am so lucky to be your mama... and it is true. I don't know how, out of all the mamas in the world, that God blessed me with YOU, Asa, but I am so glad that He did. You are a gift. A treasure. A someone I will never take for granted. I love you.

Mama

Elijah

Yesterday, the 26th, was the 6th (wow) anniversary of Elijah's passing. That day is always hard for me, but the Lord remains faithful in holding my heart. I did tear up though as Havana (4 years old) was asking me questions while I was doing her hair... our conversation went something like this:

"Mom, when will I see God with my own eyes?"
"If  you look around, You can see Him everywhere... You can see Him in the sunrise and sunset. You can see Him in the kindness of others. You can see His fingerprints everywhere."
"But when will I see His face?"
"When you go to heaven?"
"When will that happen?"
"When you are done living on this earth"
"Oh."
"Who is in heaven now? Do I know anyone?"
"Well, grammie is in heaven. And so is your older brother Elijah and Jonah's Twin Jonas"
"Is there a Havanas?"
"nope"
"A Selahas?"
"nope"
"An Asaas?"
"nope"
"Just a Jonas?"
"yep."
"Why did you lost Elijah?" (I've mentioned him before and said that I had lost him...)
"I don't know. God has a purpose for his short little life, but it was very brief."
"Oh. If you didn't lost him it would be Elijah, then Havana, then Jonah, then Selah, then Asa... There would be 5 of us."
"Yep. You're right."

(of course at this point my heart is breaking and I am also thinking well, 6 if Jonah's twin had survived.... and seven if our adoption had panned out... but I kept these thoughts to myself. It took me several minutes to fight back the tears. How I adore my precious firstborn who is so inquisitive. How I love my babies who are heaven. How I love our adopted daughter... wherever she is right now.)

Hubers

The other day we spent some time at Hubers farm! The weather was perfect and the family time was sweet! We went up there last month to pick peaches and blackberries and this time we just went up, had a picnic lunch, and played. God is such an incredible artist and Jason and I enjoyed talking about our faith in Him while we watched the sun set. I am so grateful for my family and for our faith in The Lord! As I told Jason, "If someone wants proof that God exists... Take a look at our hearts!" He has been changing and maturing us both and the life transformation is undeniable!!! What a mighty God we serve!!!

As we were playing with the children- Havana asked if I would watch her play ball so that I could cheer for her! Such fun memories!! 

Awesome-tastic!

At the pool, while Havana was swimming without any flotation device she was very proud of herself so she said, "I am awesome-tastic!" 

:) couldn't agree more! She is awesome-tastic!!!! 

Selah's 2nd Birthday.

Dear Selah,

Well, today you turned two years old. Sometimes I forget that you are only two because you talk SO MUCH and you insist on doing anything and everything that the older children are doing. You even notice if they get pizza as a slice and yours is cut up. You won't be left behind. ha. But your determination is something that I adore about you. You are adventurous and funny. You are rough and tumble- loving to wrestle and be crazy. You are also very maternal and loving. You enjoy giving kisses and hugs. You could play with your baby dolls forever - chaning their diapers, getting them food, and singing them songs. You are all around wonderful and I am so incredibly blessed to be your mommy.

We began your morning with sweet rolls. As i gave you your plate you said, "For my birthday?" You are aware that today is a special day for you. I hope you know how special you are and how much I love you.

Over the past year you have grown so much - you learned how to walk... you learned how to talk. You have even started going potty on the toilet! You enjoy just about anything: except watching TV. You won't watch a show at all. You would much rather read... you read book after book. Your favorite books are Spot the dog books.... which is why you are having a spot the dog birthday! :)

My prayer for you is for good health (for some reason your health is continually on my heart). I pray that you grow up - always being healthy and strong. I pray that physically, spiritually, and emotionally you are protected by the Lord. I pray that you will be wise, beyond your years, and that you will always strive to make God-honoring choices in Your life. I pray you realize how special you are to your mommy and daddy and that you know that God made you to be the wonderful creation you are. Jesus Christ loves you so much that he willingly died for you so that you can spend eternity with Him. There is nothing more I desire for Your life than for You to come to know Him in such a deep way... I know that is still several years up the road, but I pray what you are hearing now at age two, will plant seeds that will take root and grow into a mature faith. We live in such a morally sad time... yet I know that God can still be at work and that you can still make choices in your life that will keep you in step with His Holy Word. I pray that you never conform to this world!

Over this past year you visited the beach for the first time - which you loved (all except the car ride). You enjoyed Trick-or-Treating as a care bear. Christmas time was fun and you moved into a new room with Havana. You also became a big sister for the first time-- and you are an excellent one. You are so aware of Asa and love to look out for him. I will never forget the time you told me. "Mama, Asa, spill." Which was your way of telling me that Asa had spit up on me.... I didn't even know it, but you were watching and you were aware.

You do a wonderful job singing, dancing, and laughing. You are always a party waiting to happen. You also are becoming a "stinker" in terms of that you know how to look at me when I am correcting you -- you give me this funny little look that makes me laugh. Stinker. ;)


Some of your new funny phrases are:

• Mama, look at me! 
• I am talking to daddy (when I respond to you, but you wanted daddy to) 
• Bye bye milk- I love you (what you say when you put your milk cup in the fridge).
• You can answer "why" questions with "because..."
• You also respond to my commands with "why" -- Selah, go sit down. "Why?" (never thought I would have to tell my one year old "because mama said so...") 
• You love saying "No way." and "Yes way."
• The other day I told your daddy, "it looks like it is going to rain." and you jumped in and said, "Yeah, I know." 
• You can sing all the words to "Jesus Loves Me" 
• I'm pretty sure your favorite number is 8 and your favorite color is blue! Those are always your choices and answers! :)
• In the car you will always ask me where everyone is and what they are doing. You are also good about calling for my attention and when I give it to you you whisper, "I wanna talk to daddy..." 
• Throughout all of today you kept saying, "because its my birthday "

What a "special special" you are sweet Selah. We love you soooo much. 

Mommy