Thursday, July 29, 2010




Hm, since my last post we've had really horrible moments and really wonderful, sweet moments. So is the life, I guess.

Monday the house issues really became very stressful. As I mentioned before about the tax bill... well, it is a mess. Apparently the sellers did pay something at the closing, but the title agency didn't figure the taxes correctly and so misquoted them a figure. Long story short - the title agency, while seeing the error, says it isn't their responsibility to fix it. The seller's said they paid what they were told to and are done with it. Leaving us with a nice, hefty, tax bill from a year we didn't even own the house. This ate up a lot of our emotional energy on Monday and Tuesday. We called everyone we could to seek advice and to get someone to step up to the plate and rectify the situation. We had to decide if we wanted to seek lawyers in the matter, but we have chosen not to go down that route. I struggled with anger for a little while because it feels wrong to have to pay the bill, but my husband has finally reached a peace. I'm so proud of him. He said that we prayed for God to lead us to the house He wanted us at and he still feels confident this house is it. While we've had a lot of headaches, we are thankful for the house and we want to represent His name well. I'm proud of my husband's leadership, self control, and wisdom. I feel bad he is having to deal with all of this. Once he finally came to the conclusion on Tuesday night that he'll have to pay the bill - his spirits seemed to lift. It was a stressful two days.

The Lord is so faithful. It is true what the Bible says, "Weeping may last for an evening, but joy comes in the morning." (Psalm 30:5). He granted us with very sweet times together on Wednesday and today. Wednesday Jason worked during the day, but my time with the children at home was our typical play filled day. Jason came home and I was amazed by the way he just brings laughter into the home when he comes in! We packed everyone up and took them to a park. At home we ate a nice family dinner and truly laughed. You know, there was nothing about Wednesday that was extra special, but I almost felt as if we were on vacation because of how relaxed and joyfilled we were. Truly, a gift from the Lord after a stressful few days.

This morning His goodness continued. We took a family trip to the zoo. As many of you know, zoos rank high on my list of favorite places. Even before we had children, we would go to zoos on vacation and I had a membership to the local zoo. So, I am always excited about a trip to the zoo, but this morning the Lord gave us little love gifts in the animals. First, the weather was perfect and the zoo was not very crowded. Then, all the animals were very active. The baby giraffe was literally running around chasing the birds. It was a funny sight that made us laugh, but also it was neat to see a giraffe run! The playful energy of the baby giraffe brought a smile to our faces and warmth in our hearts. I'm sure reading this it sounds simple, but it was truly a love gift from the Lord. Yet, it gets better. We head to visit the gorillas. There was one gorilla sitting very close to the glass so we have Havana get out to "play" with it. The Gorilla seemed unimpressed by Havana and Havana seemed unimpressed with the gorilla. I thought perhaps the gorilla would like to look at a book I had brought along, but it didn't do more than just look. Then I decide to get Jonah out of the stroller. Oh. My. Goodness! The Gorilla became infatuated with Jonah on a maternal level. She would follow us, put her hands and arms on the glass trying to get Jonah, she kept looking at him. Other children tried to come up and see the gorilla, but she would ignore them and look around them to see Jonah. We stepped to the left, she stepped to the left. We stood there for about 20 minutes. Jason and I were in awe. It was a very surreal moment, but a special time for our family. Once we packed Jonah up the gorilla sulked away from the glass turning her back to all the other onlookers. Perhaps you might consider us lucky to have gone when the animals were so active, but I consider it a love token from the Lord. I believe He was blessing us for our obedience to Him in the midst of stressful times. Oh how great our God is.

Room time has continued to go well the past few days. The children are now staying in their rooms almost 15 minutes. Yesterday I told Havana it was time for room time and she ran to get her baby gate out. Such a difference. It isn't a time of confusion or anxiety anymore. I'm sure she doesn't enjoy playing by herself, but she does it. Yesterday I went in to get Jonah and it was one of those moments that captures my heart -- He was holding onto a duck animal that is in his crib. He had reached for it himself during room time and was holding it when I came in. So cute. He didn't want to let go of it so I let him carry it around for a while. He's such a sweet boy.

Yesterday I was able to play peek-a-boo with him for the first time and he loved it. Giggling like crazy. It was another one of those moments I never want to forget. He is such a sweetheart. He enjoys just hanging out, but once he sees our faces, he'll break out into a wide smile. What joy in his heart. I love it. I'm excited to see what God is going to do through him. Jason told me he has a burden to pray for Jonah much more than he ever had for Havana... makes me wonder what special things the Lord has in store for the little man in my life. I pray he is sweet and polite, unafraid of the gospel, and a fierce defender of purity. For Havana, I pray her heart always belongs to the Lord. I pray that she never struggles with self worth issues and that she never, ever settles for a man who doesn't love Jesus with his whole heart and a man who would never compromise her purity. She is worth more I hope she knows that. She is worth waiting for. So is Jonah. But that is a whole different can of worms... :)

This afternoon we had speech therapy. Elizabeth says that Havana is making great improvements. She is intentionally saying "Mom-mom" now instead of it just being a sound. She knows it means me. She also understands the terms "use your words" - we say that when we want her to actually try to say something. When we tell her to say "baby" she will sign baby, but when we tell her to use her words to say baby she will say "bebe" -- she knows a handful of words (snack, go, purple, mom-mom, notebook, bye bye)and more signs than I ever thought a little girl would know. I do like how she can ask me specifically for things now that we're getting more advanced with our signs. Elizabeth told me today that she wished she could multiply me and have all mothers as involved and dedicated as I am. That was undeserved, but still an honor to hear.

Tonight I had one of those moments with havana where my heart said, "remember this" - after dinner I was cleaning up and she was just hanging out in the kitchen with me. I have my back to her and when I turn around I see that she is looking at her reflection in the oven and she was doing all of her signs. I saw her do dada, mom-mom, baby Jonah, thank you, please, and dog. How precious. How sweet. I don't know what she was thinking or why she felt compelled to watch herself do her signs, but I loved it. A moment I don't want to forget. Ugh, darn those moments that make me cry! :)

As I continued to clean up the kitchen I started thinking about how great my daughter is. She is pretty good about first time obedience... some people say I'm hard on her, but I'm not... I have decided to fight battles with her now that I'm the boss rather than later. She really doesn't throw many temper tantrums, etc. As I'm sitting there thinking about how great everything is... my pure, sweet little daughter runs up and BITES my leg. OUCH! That is her new thing. She hasn't bitten me, but I know she has bitten Jason. Wow, it hurt and was a nice crash landing into reality that my daughter is not the perfect little angel my mind was tricking me into believing. I get down in her face and tell her no, she laughs, I hold her hands down by her side and say no again, she continues to laugh, I spank her bottom, she still laughs. So I lock her in her high chair and she begins to cry. I keep repeating "No Biting. No Biting" and then I push her chair into the corner and go back to the dishes. She is crying and signing sorry, but I make her stay there for one minute. Then I get her out, make her look me in the eye and say she is sorry, but then I explain to her that she is not allowed to bite, but that I still love her and treasure her. I also told her if she bites me again, she is going back in the chair.

The high chair was a new thing for me. We've tried putting her in the corner and she loves it. In fact, she will often put herself in the corner whenever I tell her no and laughs the entire time. It has gotten to the point that she puts herself in the corner and i really have no idea why she is there. I didn't see her do anything bad. Guess she just likes it. Clearly that won't be a way to teach her right from wrong. So in my haste to get her to understand that biting is wrong because she was clearly laughing at everything else I tried... we did the chair. We'll see if it works. I'll keep you posted. :)

Please continue to be praying for the book process. It is still undergoing theology review. I truly need this entire thing covered in prayer and so would appreciate any you might say for the book and those who might read it. Thanks, my friends. :)

6 comments:

Madonna said...

So glad to hear that room time is going much smoother!

As for the gorilla story...I wondered if the gorilla that was following Jonah was the one that recently had her baby taken from her due to injuries. So, interesting to hear how she was taken by your boy.

Darby said...

You know, someone else just told me that story tonight. I had no idea, but it kind of makes me sad to think it might be. I might take Jonah back tomorrow just to give her something to love... but perhaps that might hurt her more? I'm so sensitive...

Flossie said...

How neat about the gorilla...and heartbreaking to think that she might have been missing her baby. Shawn and I are silly about pets & animals and we realize that, but I'm continually amazed at how little credit humans give them. They're not just big, dumb blobs of flesh. They're sensitive, intelligent & caring.

erinleighclark said...

Jonah and Havana are starting to look more and more alike.

And tell me more about room time. Is it teaching them to play by themselves? What is your ultimate goal with that? Curious...

Love to all the duggers,
erin
<><

Darby said...

I agree, Joe! I love animals.

Erin, they are looking an awful lot a like. :) Room time is just to try and help Havana to be an independent player and to help with her separation anxiety. It is a basic babywise principle that they suggest you start from when they are infants (pack-n-play time) but we never did it with Havana and now at 21 months she is glued to our sides. She doesn't know how to play by herself or isn't secure if we aren't right next to her. So... we're working on it. Plus, the way I see it, if we really want 5+ kids, then I'll need some time when they can all be in their rooms and I have a breather. :)

Heather Jones said...

Wonderful blog post! Warmed my heart!